He said heâd be here at seven
The clock just hit 7:22
Itâs too cold outside
To wait for my ride
Watching mama try out a new doo (Bruins)
He said heâd be here at seven
But it just hit 7:35 (already?)
Here in Brockton, Mass.,
I got my thumb in my ass
Mamaâs combing up a big beehive (Celtics)
Where the fuck is he?
Where the fuck is he?
The bitch doesnât even bother calling
Even though itâs 7:44 (I fell asleep, pally)
Iâm feeling kinda antsy
Mamaâs getting fancy
Slicking back a wet pompadour (Red Sox)
He said heâd be here at seven
Itâs closing in on 8:01 (Trimminâ the âstache, kid)
Me lookinâ like a sap
In a wool knit cap
Mamaâs next move is a bun (fuckinâ Patriots)
Where the fuck is he? (My pants are still in the dryer, dude)
Where the fuck is he? (I couldnât find my fuckinâ snowboots, pal)
I wish I had a car (Huge, huge hangover)
Oh, no (Massive hailstorm, massive hailstorm, massive)
That stupid little punk
Heâs probably fuckinâ drunk
I bet he drank a case
Wanna pop him in the face right now
Mamaâs eyebrow
Wicked good
Wicked good (Oh, GOD)
Wicked good
Wicked good (Fuck yeah)
Wicked good
Wicked good (Pisser?)
Well my friend is still a no-show
And Iâm gettingâ fucking pissed (Why?)
âCause I couldâve gone with Charlie
In the side of his Harley
Mamaâs on the phone with a stylist (Fuck Charlie!)
So I guess I ainât going out tonight
âCause the digits say 12:09 (Shit-faced)
But call the operator
âCause one perm later
Mamaâs hair sure do look fine (Heffenreffer!!!)
Where the fuck is he? (Ah, ha ha! My stepfather was tellinâ me a wicked funny
joke!)
Where the fuck is he? (Ah, ha ha! I forgot it thoughâŚ)
I wish I had a car
I wish I had a car (A cop pulled me over, buddy)
I wish I went with Charlie (5.2 blood level, state record)
I could have gone with Charlie (Iâm in a wicked mess of trouble, haha!)
He gotta dee wee
He gotta dee wee
He gotta dee wee
He got a D.W.I. (Up the river [repeat 9x])
